Parenting is the hardest job in the world

As a parent, you are responsible for the well-being and care of another human being.  An innocent human being who only knows you.  Your job is to protect your child(ren) from a world that only seeks to destroy them at times.  Sometimes its so disheartening living in the world we live in.  There are predators, truly evil people, whose only goal in life is to destroy the innocence of a child.  Children have to be protected at all times but its nearly impossible to prevent the evils of the world from getting to them.  I know I'm rambling, but this weekend was very hard for me as a mother.  Very hard and I can't quit asking myself what did i do wrong.  What could I have changed.  But sometimes the answer is nothing.  You just have to protect your child the best you can and pray.  Pray hard.  Pray that someone else above is looking over them, to protect them from the evils in the world.  I wish we lived in a world where there wasn't so much violence, so much death, so much abuse, and so much disregard for human life.  It sickens me and makes it hard to enjoy the pleasureable moments in life when you're so worried or scared about the what ifs and unknowns.  I swore up and down I didn't want children because I didn't want to raise a child in today's world.  But it happened, and I would never take it back.  But how do you live everyday when you're in fear of the what ifs.  When everytime you open the newspaper or watch the news there's only death and sadness? My heart is heavy, and I'm probably not making sense.  But I feel like I needed to get that off my chest.  Because I don't know what will happen tomorrow, or the next day, but I also don't know how to let it go, get the fear out of my head and out of my heart.  I'll try my hardest to move forward and raise my daughter the best I can, and hope that the pain and heartache of the world avoid her.